Anti thought

I had a migraine all day yesterday. I woke up knowing it wasn’t going to be a fabulous day because of the pain, and, as always, I was right. It steadily got worse and worse. No amount of medication could shift it, and I even had to have a nap in my car at lunch to try and placate it.

migraine2

It exhausted me, and after I got home around 1800h, I was useless. I couldn’t eat, think, or decide what to do with myself. I didn’t want to fall asleep (although that would have been bliss) because I didn’t want to adjust my schedule and wake up at 3. I chatted via text with a friend for almost an hour, trying to smooth out my dark thoughts, but little was working

So I sat. I meditated. I “zenned out”. And it was glorious. I had been so preoccupied with the headache all day that I realized that I craved to be on my mat. It could have been in a broom closet at work: it wasn’t that I wanted to be home.. I just wanted a space to sit and to be alone for a few minutes.

I think this was prompted by the headache.. it took all my resources just to get through the day. Even thinking was painful, so just the act of “being” was tiring me out.

Once on the mat, I was able to sort out these feelings, as it allowed my mind to stop processing even basic thought and to allow myself a few minutes without stress, without concern, just to be.

Once I was done, I went to sleep, and although I woke up earlier than I usually would, I used that time to sit again, to reflect on how a mind numbing headache was the catalyst for a great session. The more time I spend on the mat, the more time I want to spend on the mat.

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